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I guess everyone knew that Facebook Emoticons and Metallica Death Magnetic very good thing to listen to, this new album from Metallica is really excellent.

And here’s reviews from Facebook Emoticons:

-PARODY REVIEW OF METALLICA DEATH MAGNETIC-

This is actually a guide to listen to Death Magnetica.Tako to meet Metallica know against which they have a job, a youth who did not know that they know that this is not “the shit”, but that is just shit. Of course these are my views on the album from Metallica. Maybe someone else has a different opinion, but I think it’s fair that I have my own. And in communicating with people, I think my odds not too much. It should be noted that I am a metalworker and I’m Metallica fan. I have no reason to hate them. I hate them because they would not have had 9 ogrinalnih CD (almost 200 euros) or a few original video tape (add another 20 euros), or 5 original DVD (live shit on tape and live shit on DVD, I will pray nice add another 150 euros). So this is not some kind of hate reviews, but reviews fan. I must say that currently I am too proud fan of Metallica. Drug users and their father loves his son, but when you steal the video for the fifth time, Dad was quite clear that little has to go out.
Kerry King was right. Metallica is currently sinking ship, and Rick Rubin as a top producer in that they have not helped.
The biggest disappointment, before I heard the album, which again is not recorded studio version of “No Leaf Clover.”
Album brief: long songs that make no sense.
Album in a little while as if they combined some parts of his best songs and then paste them together without taking care on the meaning and context. So a bunch of long songs that combined some good old songs. However, it is to be mixed together more good things. So kaladont is a good thing. Tuna is also a good thing. Ice cream is also a good thing. I tobasco is also a good thing. But when it all together spojiš then get angry tuna with ice cream that smells like the menthol.

In fact I read in the net as it is a good album. As the successor to a justice. As some of the songs dragged on One. As to the top. As Metallica is back. How it all together well. How is it strong and good album. And to me it was all a bit funny at the same time sad. This in my opinion do not fall into the category of good albums. Certainly there is a successor to justice. Neither song is not pulling on One, One for the song, and this is uratci. It is certainly not the top for anyone who knows the play 3 chords. Metallica is not back, only more zaglibili in some of their schemes. This is not good. And while the album may be strong, certainly not good.

For those that read it, here’s a guide:

1st This was just your life.

It begins with the sound of heartbeats. Takes 7 minutes. Then slowly replace instruments softly, then zvekne riff like someone shooting bricks. But by 1:30 there is nothing to me razbudilo. Riff starts after 1:30 pm and is super. Lars falls with double pedal. Verse is not something, but not bad. Bridge sounds like System of a down. The chorus ala Metallica. But it’s not something. Solo sounds like Kirk to the default settings. The song is boring. Karst is great. All in all bad.

2nd The end of the line

And as soon as he started the song I was instantly delighted. 8 minutes. Ritmizacije parts at the beginning are nice, but it fits the rhythm. And then I start riff that is not something. I again repeat the verse. James whine. Then start some kind of harmonization between the whole band, and it is not good. And then just falls Kirk and mind with its boring life solos. A wah it does not help me uveseli. Again, some ritmizacije. Is boring. The song fits about 6 minutes. All abated. Hetfield sings c phrase. I do not know. Then again, replace instruments. All we do sound like a bad System of a down with a worse singer than Serj.

3.Broken, Beat and Scarred

Such a feeling I had when I listened to it about 6 and a half minutes. Blentavi intro turns into something slušljivo, then start again with some riff, and Hetfield singing. A verse is boring. I think it’s wrong vocal melodies. I think the text is wrong complex. A Hetfield sounds to me a little blentavo with it. And yet some ritmiziranja in Solu and then falls again, Kirk and contaminate all further. It is really hard to listen to. Pisa me from his sola. Again return to the text and saw me. I’m tired of this song for my whole life.

4th The day that never comes

Also 8 minutes. Znaimljivo thing starts. Drums sound terrible. Basically, this song sounds more like Unforgiven, but unforgiven 3 (of which there later). After a 27 minute move text. And let’s say the text is ok. I was a good spot. But I live so far the song. I will never hear the same solo. Somehow the song sounds to me like it when najedeš French salads for Christmas that you can not breathe and then you are someone isfura some šaum šnite and forces you to eat them. This is too much St. Anger and Reload to be good. After 5 minutes, start with a solo ritmiziranjem. And it’s like listening to Children of Bodom or DragonForce. Terrible. Totally non-metallic. And then another part goes around 5:47, which should not be anything. And Lars is so far living on drums. And then another half minute ritmiziranja. And everything is boring and too DragonForce. After 6 minutes and 28 seconds, a solid solo move. Solo is just ok, but this is about the sola in the banana, including the end of that sounds a bit too “Herman Li while playing pacman.” The song ends abruptly music. No text last 3 minutes. Basically the point is boring. I am glad that is closed.

5th All Nightmare Long

8 minutes. Thing when you start is not bad. On introu even cook something dangerous. Just what is it also a little traction, but allows them. There are here and thrash and heavy and a little St. Anger, but all in all not bad. Verse goes. Hetfield who sounds a little hoop, and then a little voice deepens, and then again sounds like a hoop. Verse is not representative, but odrađenja. Chorus is as dangerous, but it really is not. Once again the chorus are a little jam-case. And then to grow again in the not-so-good verse and chorus. After that, some solo moves that is not bad. And then we behold that Kirk solira fast as his custom. From this little ritmiziraju, playing some riffs that are not something. Hetfield is Zaderi 1234, and then start the second part of sola and Lars banging on duploj pedals, but all together to no good. I will not listen to it again. There is no desire. I am not pulling anything. Again, a little flat. Basically, then again to return to the text and the song ends hetfieldovim yelling and ritmiziranjem.

6th Cyanide.

Here also there are some nice parts where zazvuče well (where most think of the beginning of the chorus), but all together is not good. Every little something strga in the song and then start again. Preloši them you break. It begins with some kind of rhythmic part through which the little kirk izdrkava with wahom. Then alone remain guitar and bass, and with the main guitar riff inserted. Verse is boring. Bridge is anything but metal. Then the chorus goes. Chorus sounds like the old Metallica, but the end of the chorus again strgan. It is not worth anything. Unbelievable how can zasrati. Then again, repeat boring zasrani verse and chorus. And then goes a broken guitar and drums.
Suddenly it all fits and starts one of the C phrases (for which they should base the whole verse, and not sing nonsense). That part is great, and it little kirk spices in Egypt for some reason, and again return to this part better. And then Kirk nateže guitar and harassed by my ear. And then he and James harmonize a little. And things fit. Then again, singing verse and chorus. But when uleti in this verse makes a sound retarded to eat some sort of chocolate mousse “Mmmmmm ….». Probably he wanted to come off cool and dangerous, and just sit out. 6:39 All in all a disappointment.

7.Unforgiven III

And her. The song starts with piano and orchestrations. And that’s not bad. Some will say that the piano has nothing to do in Metallica. I disagree. I think it’s a good idea, but …
So again, the production in a coma and on purpose. Later, insert some other part that is good. When you move the text of a sudden, I feel as if someone saddled. The text has blentav arrangement. I think maybe not, but Hetfield sings somewhat rotten, and the guitar does not excite me at all, but annoying. Bridge is also blentav. Chorus is perhaps the best part of the whole thing. Chorus is quiet. No violation there. So some continued Unforgiven 1st But to me not to listen. Somehow it seems that the darkness was unforgiven, unforgiven 2 as dark, but its a separate category. And here, as there are only alive, but just not good. The song has a head but no tail.
Solo part is ok, but partly rotten. Wah was there of course. In any case, this is a bad song. I expected more from unforigivena 3rd Pokvarlili are unforgiven. They made almost 8 minutes on average songs. And it’s not made metallica, I am convinced that no one would listen.

8.The Judas Kiss

So this is the most “old Metallica” songs on the CD. The first 20 seconds is a bad intro, which is totally unnecessary in the song. And continues to combine the parts that do not make much sense. After the intra moving song with another intro. And moving song. I must say that I am not too keen riff. Boring to me, sounds like a “new Metallica.” When you start singing it’s not so bad. Namely, the vocal sounds like a good old James. What is the best man sings. Ispjevava bouquets.
It does not work so well in the head and Lupi old Metallica. Chorus is dark, if you ask me. It is true I would have changed the drum, guitar, mix the end of the chorus, but the chorus is representative.
Has again later verse and chorus. I then went to play with breaking riffs and jam-case. And we all act a little lost. Kirk in the middle of the song take matters into their own hands and solira no reason, and cover. And it takes 35 seconds, which is a lot of time to listen to boring solo. And then from that sola went to another 30 seconds sola little better, but it is still far. I then made what was supposed to do earlier, and that is play 15-20 seconds of good solos. And then everything stops and go with a C phrase that was created through a blesavog of that irresistibly reminds us of St. Anger. C from a phrase, a matter of taking back his majesty WAH Almighty Kirk Hammet. Again playing without coverage. Wah is unfortunate enough protrpio again. Parts of the sola sound good, but the solo is a solo debris. After that sola starts again some of which would be C as the second phrase. It is also totally St.Anger. So wrong. And from that start again in the chorus, which is good. The song would be better to just 15 times repeat chorus after say 10-year repeating chorus that Kirk plays 15 seconds of solid sola. The song takes 8 minutes. It could take 4-5 minutes with a comfortable and would be better. I do not know where to prove. It turns out that more Metallica does not know what to do with them. I do not know how to control it. I do not know the more out or filter out bad things.

9th Suicide and redemption.

Is instrumental. The song is koncipitana some kind of 3 deeds. As the first part of the suicide, the other is some kind of transitional period, and then as a redemption which would be some kind of hell. Now, however, to announce that it is not what it should be.
Thing goes. Now I’m not happy. The guitar sound sounds like what Metallica should not be. A bome or drum is not what it should be. The first part takes a minute and a half I was boring. The first part can be described as a “jam in which Lars agree some sort of face, where he put his lower lip under the upper teeth and playing as if playing some subject, while the other side of room is that James is pressed lips and thinking how this riff goes through space.” I have the impression that I lied.
I then moved some of which intersect the first minute. That part was almost taken from the album Cold Beers.
And then again return to the above guarantee the lips.
Then start some sort of bridge / chorus. That part to me sounds totally lost. From beginners demo bands I’ve heard better riffs.
Ugalvnom after 3 minutes and 10 seconds again, make some sort of heavy section that we all work except for “thrills.” Heavy stock lasts about 30-35 seconds.
The song fits easily and went slowly to harmonize the guitar. Certainly not thrilled after 3 and a half minutes of boredom. And it takes Jend harmonization that is not an easy time. I have the impression that they wanted to repeat the “nice” part of the Master of Puppets, but it turned out this horror. Harmonization is added to the riff and the drum a little more dangerous. But all along we actually irritate the stomach. Ideas are punkerske, not metal.
After this part, which has no meaning no, they go to the “Orion” and start isfuraviti some solažice Egypt, but it just does not sound. That solo is so far istrzavanje that turns into a slapping and over-wah rhythm.
At 7:30 Lars include a double pedal and go bang, but that will come to mind it a good old “you can not ulaštiti shit.”
Then a little play with the mid-riff starts things slowly fade and the song-a. And this nonsense takes 10 long, long minutes.

10th My Apocalypse

Ok. The title promises. The song takes 5 minutes.
Riffovi not something. After 30 seconds go play thrash over the same riff. It is not good. Imagine a combination of those annoying drums and thrash St.Anger over it. Well this is the thing. It mentions the name of the album. But this does not help singing.
After almost 2 minutes the song stops. Start riff and then just go with real thrash. But that’s not it. After just a couple of verses, James begins to scream as the girl, and then kirk go whine with a guitar. But the solo is also a lie.
Then move one part of which is a System of a Down, James starts to sing over that part.
After that song back in the beginning. Thrash drum + St. Anger.
Song lagno drop dead.

Where have you been? – Nowhere What were you doing? – Nothing.

In the end really do not know what to say. Predictions were true. Something is rotten in the state of Denmark, which is Lars. Do not recommend buying the CD. I do not buy. If some concert near or even at home, I will not go because I upilati with boring songs. Message to children. If you want to listen to some new metal, then buy United Abominations by Megadeth. According to the Death Magnetic, United Abominations is a masterpiece. On this album can even be something to hear. There are even good songs. Solid music and a better overall impression. And if you’re really stuck for Metallica, you have Master of Puppets, … And Justice for All and Metallica (Black Album). Give ear to this.

I am convinced that poor Rob Trujillo when he comes home a little predahne, sits on the edge of the bed and took a little head. It is really sad where it came from. And what is the best currently on the menu in Metallica najsimpatičniji character. Sorry man. I will not listen to this album, and spend your time on it. I have no desire to hear it all again. Sad. Maybe it’s time to really leave the instruments. Nice guitar in the closet and put paid to the barbecue.

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